i guess i'm just goth

[mellowtigger]

bitterlawngnome pointed out a picture gallery devoted to wresting the name "bear" from its traditional base and giving it solely to the devotion of hairy fitness buffs. It's been a while since I posted my own definition of bear, but this new picture collection called "Bear | Not Bear" (semi-safe viewing for most workplaces) seems diametrically opposed to my definition.

Basically, I think that "bear" includes the unpopular kids, the D-list crowd, all the folk who don't fit the popular culture's image of what is desirable. We remind each other that we don't have to be X, Y, or Z in order to be desirable.  We innoculate ourselves against the contamination of popular culture's dislike of fringe appearance or fringe behavior.  I enjoy thinking of bears as the Stuart Smalley fan club: "We're good enough, we're smart enough, and doggone it, people like us."

When the bear population grew large enough to attract mainstream attention, then suddenly the popular kids developed an interest. Nothing good can come of that mixture, and the discord is effectively satirized in the South Park episode about the Goth kids being overtaken by the Vampire kids.  Their tension is presented in this video segment...

You guys, I do not want to be grouped in with douchey little vampire kids. ... Get out of our space you little twerps!
More preppy straight-A students turning into vampires. What the hell is going on?
- http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/210819/douchey-little-vampire-kids

... and the difference is skillfully defined in the closing moments of the episode.

Fellow students, over the past week there has been a lot of confusion, and so we have asked for this assembly to clarify the difference between goth kids and vampire kids. Let us make it abundantly clear. If you hate life, truly hate the sun, and need to smoke and drink coffee, you are goth. If, however, you like dressing in black 'cause it's fun, enjoy putting sparkles on your cheeks and following the occult while avoiding things that are bad for your health, then you are most likely a douchebag vampire wannabe boner because anyone who thinks they are actually a vampire is freaking retarded.
- http://www.milkandcookies.com/link/137227/detail/

So the metaphor of the popular kids trying to steal a movement from the unpopular kids is what I use to interpret the recent "redefining" of bear.  Unlike the resolution in the South Park episode, I don't know that the bears can actually reclaim their original identity.  Words are fluid, though, and language always changes, so maybe there's still reason to hope.

Or maybe we need to take a cue from Dan Savage and go on the offensive.  We could create our own new word to apply to these people, thereby deflecting their criticism of the original bear culture.

Comments

[foeclan.livejournal.com]

Our only solution is to burn down Eddie Bauer.

[mellowtigger]

That solution would match the South Park example, at least. :)

I changed my blog settings which were too restrictive. OpenID posts should no longer automatically be screened. If I see any spammers appear here, though, then I'll move it back to screening. :(

[furr_a_bruin]

If any stupid attitude-oozing fucktard ever has the nerve to try and tell me I'm "not a bear", he's gonna find out why pissing off a grizzly is never a good idea. Though I have to admit, it will be difficult to NOT start off with the Patsy Stone line, "Oh, you little bitch-troll from hell!" *grin*

I've been a "bear" since shortly after the concept took off amongst furry gay men in the '80s; if anyone can claim to "know what a bear is," I'd say that my qualifications in that area are impeccable. Hell, I was published in BEAR Magazine when it was still digest-size!

A lot of people seem to want to make it very psychological - but for me, it boils down at the core to "A Bear has fur." On the face, on the body - preferably both - but there's gotta be fur. Whether the body under the fur is muscular, skinny or chubby makes little difference, though the "archetypical" bear is stocky/burly, after our namesake animal. (And if some guys identify more with "otter" or "wolf" - that's up to them. Wolves and Otters and Bears, oh my!)

Because, you see, there's nothing wrong with NOT being a Bear, and to me - if "anyone can be a Bear" then the term has no meaning.

As for the sewage-filled skinbags attempting to co-opt beardom, all it takes is for those of us who've been Bear longer than they've known where their cock is to stand our ground, channel our inner Grizzly and snarl at them until they run for cover.

[mellowtigger]

NBCS 1.0 does a good job of reminding that "Bear" was initially about facial hair back in 1989. That's the primary scale of "Bear-ness". Already recognized as secondary characteristics, however, were other undesirable traits (by gay male standards of the time) like weight, general hairiness, peculiarity, and stereotypical effeminacy. Since then, we do seem to have lost the initial hairy face focus. Maybe everybody got bored with it after the years that all of America spent fixating on Wolverine in the X-Men movies?

It makes me sad when guys show up at Bear functions and feel actively excluded. A year or two ago as a Bear coffee night was winding down, an old guy in his late 60s stopped me and thanked me for being so willing to chat with everyone. I prefer treating everyone the same so it really was nothing unusual that I did, but it made me realize that some people there felt excluded because they weren't popular enough to rate as "desirable company" by others. :(((

Yeah, I feel like I've earned a few bear brownie points over the years too.

1) I just did a scan for my old RELAY and IRC intro text file, but I wasn't able to find it. I hope I haven't lost it forever. I'm pretty sure I included my NBCS classification in it. Where did NBCS first show up, was it on Usenet maybe? Or did it even come from FidoNet initially?

2) I still have my "Just say Woof!" t-shirt from the mid 1990s, but it's looking rather thin and worn these days.

3) I've attended Bear coffee locally for over a decade, with a few breaks here and there.

[furr_a_bruin]

Yeah - as I recall, "bearish" guys had sort of been a subset of the "girth and mirth" phenomenon, but those who weren't thrilled with the idea of being lusted after for being chubby didn't entirely fit there. When the bear phenomenon kicked off with the focus on fur, they came a-woofing. ;)

I haven't read the whole NBCS in a long time, but as I recall they focused on beards because it's generally obvious if someone has a beard or not; a guy could have three hairs on his breastbone or a forest primeval from the collarbone down, and in a lot of circumstances (clothes, ya know) it would be exceedingly difficult if not impossible to tell the difference.

I agree with you about people being left feeling excluded at what's supposed to be a social meet 'n greet kind of event. I don't understand people who won't talk to someone they don't find sexually attractive.

To be honest, I'm not sure exactly where NBCS was first published - I first encountered it through the then-popular Bears' Mailing List.

[mellowtigger]

"... all it takes is for those of us who've been Bear longer than they've known where their cock is to stand our ground, channel our inner Grizzly and snarl at them until they run for cover."

p.s. Since you clearly have the enthusiasm, what offensive name should we claim for these people? Something easier to say than "douchey little vampire kids" or "sewage-filled skinbags"? :) Dan Savage gave us neologisms like "saddlebacking" and "santorum". Which offensive word shall we create to distinguish popular posers from historical bears? Take a moment to consider how you'll define a turning point in Bear history. ;)

[furr_a_bruin]

Oof... that's an excellent question. It needs to be witty and to the point; "sewage-filled skinbags" is a pretty generic insult, really. Savage's neologisms are specific to the topic, and we need something like that.

I may just throw this out to my online social circle, as some of them are far cleverer with words in this way than I am. The first thing that comes to mind is "pseudobear" but it doesn't have the right flavor.

[bitterlawngnome]

This back and forth is an inherent part of bear culture; there was never a Golden Era when everyone agreed on what a bear was. Not even in 1989; we were already having this argument. I remember sitting on the couch with my partner of the time trying to figure out what it was all about - so many different opinions LOL

About the best you can do is put *your* opinion out there. While there's a buck to be made off the name there will always be musclebears.